Tag Archives: BL

Gay Porn and other Delicacies Part One: A History

If you know me well, you would know that I find homosexual acts very objectifyingly satisfying. If this offends you in any way….

A IDGAF
You saw the title! Whatcha click for?

As I was saying, from a young age, I’ve enjoyed homosexual acts. As I’ve edited this post, I realized not only did/do I enjoy homosexual acts between men, it’s the same for women (and really, any consensual acts between attractive humans is pretty much okay).

In 3rd, 4th, or 5th grade- all three?- we had a porn video. We called it the ‘blank tape’ because, as you might’ve guessed, it was blank. I don’t remember who put it in the VCR first. Perhaps we all did before we all came together and realized that everyone else knew that the tape was nudie. Ma and Pa told us not to watch it, the youngest (Lil Sis and Lil Bro- both #2) would put it in the VCR all the time and laugh and giggle and do things that little kids do when they are being little assholes who do things they know they’re not supposed to do, yadda yadda yadda, and found a little interest in it.

One time, I watched it from the beginning to end. Under the pretense of sickness, I skimped out on Bible study to get the damn thing all to myself without worry of someone coming out of a room to catch me- though I’m sure someone had it in their mind that I would look at it.

It was made up of about five or six scenes, and the second scene- about 32 minutes in, maybe- was a lesbian scene. I didn’t know what things like aroused and turned on or horny meant, but I recognize now that the lesbian scene was indeed arousing.

But I skipped it. I was a God-fearing ten-or-so-year-old and I was already being terrible enough. Plus, I thought that the heterosexual couples were- don’t laugh- were, you know, together. Husband and wives and stuff.

stupid me

And I watched the rest, always with the lesbian scene in the back of my mind. I don’t know exactly what happened afterwards, but I believe Ma or Pa called home saying they went out to eat something and so, though I had planned to stop completely when I had satisfied my curiosity, I decided to watch the lesbian scene completely. I turned it up a little and it turned out to be a ‘mother’/’daughter’ thing. The ‘mother’ apparently cheated on the ‘daughter’ and the ‘daughter’ decided to punish her… by having sex with her… Or something.

You don’t care about ‘plot’ in porn and neither did I. Somewhat. I always enjoyed the scene more when I could hear it, even putting in earphones.

Around the same time, my aunt had an anime magazine. It had a review on the BL/yaoi/shounen ai/gay-romance-intended-for-a-female-audience Original Video Animation called “Fake”.

First BL

I most definitely was watching “Fake” on the DVD player around the same time as I would sneak the blank tape in the dying VCR. And it was only until the VCR died and all our VHS tapes disappeared that I started gay male romance hunting in earnest.

Let’s back up. There was only a very tiny anime picture for “Fake” in the magazine. My aunt had bookmarked it and, her being my favorite aunt then and now, I was completely interested in what had her smiling every time she looked at it.

The two characters you see had their faces close together and all, and at the time I had no fucking idea which was the girl and which was the boy (that’s heterosexual privilege by the way-you see people making lovey-dovey eyes and you start putting them in gender constructs!). I guessed the light-haired guy on the bottom was the girl, because, ya’ know, he was light-haired and on bottom.

But I went back to the article, because I tend to get batshit-obsessed with things until I completely figure them out. My aunt caught me and got pissed and so I was scared away for about a month.

And then the “Fake” DVD appeared in our house, held among my aunt’s possessions. I tried to watch it through my parents’ room; their door had windows in them so that I could see into that entertainment room in which my aunt would watch “Fake” alone. But she caught me and covered up the windows.

One day, while she was watching it, I actually read the review article on “Fake” by Sanami Matoh in the comfort of her room. I remember the way they wrote it came off to me in big neon lights as GAY PORN!!!!!! I was sure it was going to be just as raunchy as the lesbian scene. Later, aunt went out drinking or something and the family went to Bible study and I, legit, had to practice my trombone for a chair test coming up (a chair test that started me in the first three chairs for the rest of my middle school career, as I would never, ever be among the last again). 

I watched all of “Fake”. I think there were two kissing scenes and dark-haired dude trying to undress light-haired dude. Overall, though I did like the ghost-and-murder plot and all, the GAY PORN!!!!!!! bit was quite lacking. Didn’t stop me from watching it at every opportunity, though. 

Of course, I still believed in god and all that…

Sexy Zechs-yStep back. My aunt also read fanfiction. She gave me a Dragon Ball Z fanfic with Bulma and Vegeta and told me to skip the ‘nasty’ parts. Of course, I read them. (Mama also gave me romance novels, where I realized that adult writing can be just as simple as what I read at school, and that the middle part of any piece of erotic writing is probably a sex scene).

And after/around that time (March 2000) the anime series Gundam Wing appeared on Cartoon Network. Gundam Wing had five main guys and was a catalyst not only for more serious anime to appear in America on a more regular basis (and not just Pokemon and Yugioh type shits to cater to children and their fetish for toys), but also for gay fanfiction. There were also two other main guys. Turkey Blondie up there and his best friend… lover… enemy… Very complicated have-to-watch-the-show-to-understand thing. They were my favorite couple to read.

Putting the pieces together, I started to look for gay erotic fanfiction because heterosexual fanfiction was either 1) Romance lovey-dovey same shit over and over utter crap 2) Straight-out porn. I mean, a lot of fanfiction- most of fanfiction is pretty much porn. But I’m talking about that porn porn. For example, you can’t really put A Rake’s Vow by Stephanie Laurens in the same category as Real Female Orgasms 13, as there’s something infinitely more pornographic about something about orgasms and a harlequin for which many can’t wait until the heroine and her lover bump uglies. Another post entirely. 

And that’s when I found yaoi (or, as I like to call it, BL, so I could encompass shounen-ai). The main distinction between the two is that yaoi is a lot more pornographic than shounen-ai, usually. Yaoi is an acronym for it, really. While shounen-ai translates to boys’ love, and is more about, you guessed it, love between males. Of course, all of this is targeted towards females, because Japanese females like that stuff- and so do a lot of other females, of course. That is to say, it’s not at all representative of gay men in reality. although some, like heterosexual fiction, may hit close to home to many.

BL is short for boys’ love but has gotten distinct from shounen-ai as that it usually includes yaoi nowadays.

HomosinYou might have figured out that I might have had a little trouble reconciling my penchant for gay porn (when I started watching porn, my interest could only stay on lesbian porn. Gay male porn was just soooo… Quiet… And hard to find when I was so young!) with my Christian beliefs and over and over I would pray to stop finding any pleasure in it, or promising the lord that I’ll never look at it again. I had a few crazy things happen when my parents saw or read what I read- back when they thought homosexuality caused AIDS and that the ‘lifestyle’ including unlimited sex and drugs and hell-bentness.

My mind had shut down and I was just so angry and depressed- over gay porn really! I couldn’t find interest in anything except books, but then I would get sexually aroused and nothing really eased that unless I read some yaoi.

I went back to it (duh) and eventually gave up god and have been doing my own thing ever since.

I wrote fanfiction, and now I work mainly on original stuff. But my desire for different, alternative sexualities and genders and sex(es) has me writing about male-leaning hermaphrodites in a fantasy slave society. I also identify with the kink scene and wish for deeper submission within myself and within such a society. I actually started with the rough stuff around middle school. Unfortunately, that was also a time where I got more selective with what gay porn I was reading (or what lesbian porn I was watching). I particularly remember several things that I perused oftener than anything else, or before trying out something new:

  • Velvet by Kumiko– A fanfiction between the main male adult characters in “Gundam Wing”, and one other of the main five. Basically, Turkey Blonde takes in Ginger, an ex-lawyer who was kidnapped and put into a whole slave ring sort of deal. Turkey Blondie is the master of the house and demands obedience. Chinese main guy is already his very obedient slave. Well, drama and kink ensue and it’s terribly wonderful and very much the fanfic that set me spiraling into BDSM. I lost it around 2003 and didn’t find it again until, I think, 2010. And I was ecstatic.
  • A Little Wager by Casual Otaku– Another fanfic. The main couple rivals of the video game series King of Fighters. I was actually going to skip it because it seemed super weebo with the terrible bits of Japanese thrown in so often and the fall-quickly-in-love trope. But with the author’s little tidbits, I had a feeling the person knew exactly what they were doing. So I kept on. Basically, one guy loses to another guy in a bet and has to do everything he says (haha, so original). Of course, the winner makes him his slave and then things get really heated and further into BDSM I go.
  • Kneel by bastmoon– …Fanfic! Hahaha! Between the co-protagonist and lead antagonist of anime “Fushigi Yuugi”. Pro gets taken prisoner by Anta. I could tell I was into some rough stuff because I didn’t follow “Fushigi Yuugi” at all. My aunt had one video which I watched the bloopers of over and over. However, I became super attached to this bit o’ porn.
  • Starts With a Spin by maxine– A Harry Potter, Draco/Harry fanfic that I’mma add just to show that I’m not only a sadist/masochist. I’ve read this four times!

You might be wondering…

Why though

 

When I was in 9th grade, my parents told me I would grow out of anime and video games, for various reasons, and that I’ll never follow through with them as a career or anything. I believed them, too, wanting to be a thoracic surgeon or some sort intensive doctor like that throughout my middle years in high school. Yeaaah…. That followed through, didn’t it?

I can’t really think of why. There really wasn’t any turning point that I remember. When I was very young, five-six-seven and on, I remember imagining Barbie’s friends doing horrible things to Barbie while she was naked, and the characters of video game Tekken 2 getting together, doing vague nakey stuff, and having babies and fighting bad guys of various natures (I was big on an oatmeal… Like, everyone would be naked and covered in oatmeal and fighting bad guys). Now that I really think about it… I was pretty much destined for some really out-of-this-world shit.

But what, exactly, am I into in regards to Gay Porn and Other Delicacies, and what do I recommend as part of my crazy-ass psyche?

How about I explain that in Part 2: Tickle Me Bits
How about I explain that in Part 2: Tickle Me Bits

Where Have You Beeeen!

Also: It’s Been a While, and There’s no Sunshine When She’s Gone, etc.

 

Well, between video games and writing and working and watching anime and sleeping and various mental blockages, I haven’t had the motivation for a proper post about anything. But now I’ve built up. Will I live in Baltimore soon? Will I live long enough in Murfreesboro? How can I possibly stay in glamorous touch with my sister, who has been working her ass off on a farm (the same program I was in 4 years ago!), and what’s in store for me regarding Temple University, either in Pennsylvania or Japan?

What is Intent vs. Impact? Does anyone who doesn’t really understand what this mean actually care?

Does my compulsive liar, selfish being of a sister have mental blockages like me that makes her just as deserving of anyone’s sympathy as I acquire?

Has the shoujo anime market finally ensnared me? With Chihayafuru and Red Data Girl being among the best anime I’ve ever watched, am I finally among the demographic?!

Is appreciating the eye candy in Suisei no Gargantia making me a complete sell-out? Ledo and Amy are so moe! I want to devour them!

The PS3 controller is so much better for me it’s CRAZY. I had about ten wins with Lili in Tekken 6 on the XBox 360. PS3 Tekken Revolution? 81 wins. EIGHTY-ONE FUCKING WINS! I’m getting messages from friggin’ awesome players telling me it was a good game! To see if t was all just flukes, I went back and played Tekken Tag Tournament 2 for the 360. For some reason, my reactions were slower, clunkier, and I made the silliest mistakes. PS4 is definitely in the future.

The Last of Us is awesome so far. I’m taking my time. Also, I’m actually playing online with a shooting game. Never done that before~!

I don’t ever want to work with food again! Secretarial work please and thank you!

I can’t believe I’ve ever believed in god or spirits. The scientific and logical reasoning against it is mind-boggling.

I do not get hangovers.

I did not drop from that high too badly, though I dropped enough to miss the correct time at work, and have a mental breakdown, but I was fine by that evening.

I have very specific tastes in anime art, despite my range of enjoyable things to watch. This mostly has to do with reading yaoi smut.

I need to learn a lot more kanji. I’m translating this BL game and it’s taking forever. Though there are some grammar points that I have to research, it’s looking up the damn kanji that’s just sucking out all my energy.

I need more porn.

Also… The reason why I wanted to make this post:

‘Spanking’  (and etc. plus constant criticism and belittling) over every minor infraction didn’t make me love my parents, or God more, it just made me afraid of them, and all the more determined to get away from them as soon as I possibly could. No mean feat, considering my self-esteem is rock-bottom in my young adult years… I always feel like I’m doing something wrong. 

It also made us much more secretive and deceptive, hiding things from our parents became an art form. Another neat trick considering my mom was nosy as shit, and felt perfectly justified in reading our mail, going through our drawers, etc. To this day lying to my mom dad is an automatic response, no matter the topic…, and I’m usually honest to a fault with everyone else I know. 

So great job No One. Keep up that Christian love, and maybe, just maybe, your spouse will go easy on you in the divorce. 

Quote taken from LDM, changed to reflect me just a bit more. See you soon!

Hellishly Hot with “642 Things To Write About”

The titles for this have changed but the quality of content has not. Sharing this stuff on Facebook makes me well-aware that I’m getting it out to the most amount of people I can, for free! I could actually do something with my tumblr or get a Twitter, but, meh.

Oh, yea, Facebook? Tiny, tiny drop, just as I thought.

Prompt #86-The president’s personal to-do list

My response:

1. Meet with theorists about Korean threat

2. Remind the fly-releaser that no one’s talked about me being the Antichrist for about a week

3. Listen in on Limbaugh/Fox/Far-right agency to see how well I’m doing- Remember, angrier they are, the better I’m doing

4. Smile less. Michelle doesn’t believe I’m not looking at pretty ladies anymore- remember secretary comment- Bad Obama!

5. Write speech- 500th one! (Subsequently reward self with a two-day golf vacation)

6. Fire the white guy who keeps talking about how great it is I’m a black president

7. Fire the white guy who keeps scoffing at guy in 6

8. Work out

9. Manipedi

10. Get teeth clean

11. Honor more promises

Sister’s response:

1. Peace- North Korea

2. Sign The Documents

3. Break- Hang out with family

4. Solve gay marriage and gun control issues

5. Take kids to the dentist

6. Photoshoot

7. Speech

Prompt#87- The general manager of the New York Yankees’ personal to-do list

My response: (I know more about butterfly migration patterns than the freakin’ Yankess- but here goes!)

1. Send hate mail to Red Sox

2. Send mocking letters to Astros

3. Pray to Special Bat and Special Ball on Special Field

Sister’s response:

1. Practice 5AM to 5PM tomorrow

2. Wash all jerseys

3. Pick up all balls

4. Gameplay

5. Practice game with Giants

6. Have someone clean field

7. Have someone to do 2 and 3

(haha)

Prompt#88- A powerful Hollywood agent’s personal to-do list

My response: (Okay, it’s officially unfun now)

1. Call diet manager and trainer

2. Tip off The Inquirer and Us about tomorrow’s secret outing

3. Email The Others

4. Pay NYPD, LAPD, Holiday Inn, Motel 6, and the people between fortieth and fiftieth

5. No more gin, ever

6. No more coke, ever

Sister’s response:

1. Fire coffee lady

2. Fire make-up artist

3. Fire donut boy

4. Fire Jack Black

5. Fire camera crew

6.Fire designers

7. Hire new crews

(Sister has more of a story going on XD)

Prompt#89- Three objects in your childhood bedroom

My response:

I can’t really remember anything but my bed and siblings… Ah! In middle school, I had the BL manga Fake- which I managed to get even though it had plastic wrap and adult content; the blue radio which I skipped to; and the Harry Potter book- I think maybe the first. I still have Fake, and I have an iPod now. :D

Sister’s response:

Stuffed animals, bunk beds, and syrup stain.

Prompt#90- The toy you most treasured

My response:

I had a stuffed bear with blue paws. It was soft and big, though that might have been because I was small. At one point, we all had a favorite stuffed animal, and then there was a time that mine was in the best shape or not missing. Now it’s gone, and my sisters still have Penelope and Minnie Mouse.

Sister’s response:

Penelope. I don’t know why, but she is the best toy ever. She doesn’t do much, but when it’s playing time, she’s always there.

Prompt#91- What’s stored in your closet?

My response:

My and others’ clothes, suitcases, my Teahouse paraphernalia, some games I’ve beaten (Final Fantasy XIII, Silent Hill Homecoming and Downpour), a tea set, a Shakespeare set, books I’ve read (the Pendragon books) and several volumes of various gay pornography.

Sister’s response:

Twilight books, old clothes, stuff from middle school, about 30 folded chips bags, boxes, sister’s stuff, and ceramics, and stuffed animals.

Prompt#92- The next sound you hear and what caused it

My response:

The crickets outside are doing their thing. They used to annoy the flipping fuck out of me, but they are okay now. Not to the point of lulling me to sleep or anything like you might read elsewhere, but not nearly as maddening as when I heard them when I was younger.

Sister’s response:

My sister saying “The next sound I heard after ‘it’ were crickets”. What caused it was the prompt asking ‘The next sound you hear and what caused it’.

(She’s freakin’ hilarious!)

Kuroko no Basuke or Why I love Sports Anime! or Why I hate Sports Anime!

Rating: 9/10

  • 10= Orgasmic and will watch again, by myself
  • 9= Awesomesauce, high chance of watching again, by myself
  • 8= Fantastic, medium chance of watching again, by myself
  • 7= Great, there’s a chance of watching by myself
  • 6= Nice, would need inspiration to watch by myself
  • 5=Good, will watch again , with friend(s)
  • 4= Average, medium chance of watching again, with friend(s)
  • 3= Below Average, low chance of watching again even with friend(s)
  • 2= Ho-hum, no chance of watching again
  • 1= Bad, regret watching

Vassalord Review

K Project

Uta no Prince-sama

Biases and pet peeves relevant to this anime with correlating points that don’t mean much:

  • Good Fanservice +30
  • BL Fanservice +70
  • Equal Fanservice +100
  • More realistic than not +40 (Mostly pertains to martial arts or sports anime)
  • Holy Animation Budget! +100
  • Tasteful Drama+200 (Gets higher than norm because it wouldn’t have been hard to be over the top)
  • Humor +50 (It is hilarious!)
  • Powerful women +70 (The main coach is a lady in high school!)
  • Protagonist loses +10 (I mean, it happens, but I was really geared for them winning aaaaaand..)
  • They aren’t naked nearly enough
  • Wasted beach episode -100
  • Dialogue at unrealistic times, even in head -100 (It was really conspicuous, too. Plus, they did a good job of it at other times)
  • We tried (Sis is here)

470 Points! You know what, I think it is kind of better than K Project… I mean, categorically it is, but to me… Yea, it is. I prefer the nature of shows like K Project, but comedy with a bit of drama (with no one dying) really helps out in me liking it overmuch.

Lemme me give you the biz:

This guy (Kuroko)
This guy (Kuroko)
meets this guy (Tagami)
meets this guy (Tagami)

This guy on the left (Kuroko) meets this guy on the right (Tagami). They fall in love but never admit it to each other.

The end.

For seriously though, Kuroko and Tagami become freshmen at a high school which has a pretty new basketball club. Tagami’s coming back from going to school in America, and Kuroko’s coming from Teiko Middle School. This school was the best middle school-  a Generation of Miracles appeared and had them winning National championships and all that.

But dear Kuroko wasn’t part of the main team, for he’s a really weak player. However, his passes kick so much ass he was called the sixth player. This anime deals with Kuroko and Tagami, a guy in fantastic shape for basketball, and their team against other teams, including the teams the other members of the Generation of Miracles joined.

Okay, so I did not expect to get into this anime as much as I did. After Prince of Tennis (which I’ve watched most of and liked a bunch) and trying, and failing at, Slam Dunk and Major, I was sort of unwilling to give this anime a chance.

Then I saw the fanart.

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So, when the fanart from people is this heavy, it usually draws from okay to official foundations. The bunch o’ guys thing drew me- but it could have been like Major, which I didn’t get into, or Prince of Tennis, which I wasn’t really feeling anymore.

So my sister and I started watching it on Crunchyroll. There’s a running gag that Kuroko is unnoticeable because he has no presence (or emotions- well, he does but… you gotta watch him deadpan the silliest things).

Deadpan

Deadpan 2

I found the humor very American, with sarcasm and such straight-faced announcements around every turn, while most comedic anime focuses on something absurd. You know, like many cartoons aren’t really about clever jokes, just crazy stuff happens and you’re supposed to laugh? In many American cartoons (the one catering to older audiences, and just plain good ones) that sort of humor is prevalent and the poor children are growing up too early!

Anywhowage, the realistic basketball drew me in so fast I’m still feeling the whiplash. Sure, the do soliloquies in the middle of jumping, but for the most part, you aren’t going to be against the laws of physics.You would think that would eventually get boring buuuut between Kuroko and Tagami not getting along, losing, and the fair amount of airtime for plenty of other characters to shine and this show game me something pretty well-rounded and an absolute delight to watch.

Kise vs Aomine

Very nice. Very nice throughout. I suggest that even if you don’t like sports, its very good for the characters and humor. If you don’t like sports anime, I think this is actually a change of pace from many- except for maybe Major, which I never finished.

Also, cute thing:

Color

Kuroko: The ‘kuro’ of Kuroko means black, pertaining to his shadow-like illusion quality, I presume.

Akagi: The ‘aka’  Akagi means red! Don’t know much about him yet….

Kise: ‘Ki’ of Kise means yellow (or the color of energy like lightning or electricity- and he’s the most energetic!)

Aomine: ‘Ao’ means… Okay, you get it.

Midori(ma) and Murasaki(bara) the last two. I thought at first- wow, how original, characters named after the color of their hair.

Then I realized I know no other anime where the characters are named after the color of their hair. XD Watch Kuroko no Basuke!

P.S. I ship Tagami/Kuroko, Aomine/Kuroko and Aomine/Tagami super hard. I didn’t know so many thought of a solution of them having a threesome. *-*

Vassalord or Why I Love Animation Budgets! or Why I Hate Animation Budgets!

Rating: 10/10

  • 10= Orgasmic and will watch again, by myself
  • 9= Awesomesauce, high chance of watching again, by myself
  • 8= Fantastic, medium chance of watching again, by myself
  • 7= Great, there’s a chance of watching by myself
  • 6= Nice, would need inspiration to watch by myself
  • 5=Good, will watch again , with friend(s)
  • 4= Average, medium chance of watching again, with friend(s)
  • 3= Below Average, low chance of watching again even with friend(s)
  • 2= Ho-hum, no chance of watching again
  • 1= Bad, regret watching

K Project Review

Uta no Prince-sama Review

From hereon, and I should have put this in others, but there are spoilers- SPOILERS!- spoilers~ Alright? Alright.

Biases and pet peeves relevant to this anime with correlating points that don’t mean much:

  • HOLY ANIMATION BUDGET! +200
  • Supernatural/Paranormal/Sci-fi +20
  • Good fanservice +30
  • BL fanservice +70
  • Fighting +10
  • Tasteful drama +50
  • Twist! +100

 

  • I can think of something…
  • Hrm…
  • No sex! -2
  • ?
  • Not long enough! -20

End score- 458! Much higher than “K Project”, and even though it is entirely sexless, I was very much impressed with this OVA.

So what happened?

Snazzy
Charles Chrishunds

This is who the caption says he is. He is as horribly serious as he looks. Which as usual in the anime/manga world- especially anime/manga with a tinge (well, a lot more than tinge, perhaps) of BL- makes him utterly adorable. He’s a second-generation-vampire cyborg.

You heard right, VAMPIRE CYBORG. Plus, he’s a super-religious guy who only drinks vampire blood- basically that of his maker.

I actually read “Vassalord” the manga while I was in the now-defunct Borders at the mall. They had an intensively ginormous manga section. What I could get out of “Vassalord” was that Charles was made a vampire by a nonchalant guy named Johnny Rayflo. Isn’t that not just the coolest name ever?

I know more now because of the anime, where Charles gets Johnny ‘as food’ to bring with him on a vampire-hunting mission from the Vatican- yay!

How I feel on mornings.
Johnny Rayflo and…How I feel on mornings.

Turns out, some nun issued this as a private mission in order to trade Johnny for a little lady in a tank. Next thing we see, little lady has killed everyone at this secret church place, and Charles and Johnny arrive, and Charlie is worried about Johnny sacrificing himself.

Little lady, named Maria, doesn’t care for dear Charlie, and we learn that she is also one of Johnny’s ‘children’, except a lot older than Charles, and, um, crazy. When Johnny refuses to kill Charles as she demanded, she tries to kill Charles instead. What happens then… Mwahahaha!

Now, like I said, I’ve only seen a smidgen of the Vassalord manga, and forgot about it the years since (it was like five or six years ago that I read the few chapters), so I had no idea that this thing had action, just gay vampire dudes. Or two vampire dudes that had no trouble doing everything but sex with each other. With that in mind, and the fact that the Aarinfantasy forum had it in the BL section, I wasn’t expecting much. BL anime tend to be horribly or lazily animated, even if they were beautiful. For example “Gakuen Heaven”, “Gravitation”, and “Sukisho” can have some pretty good stills, but it might as well have stayed manga because nothing moves very much. I noticed that they are pretty drama-packed. But even BL with sex- like “Ikoku Irokoi Romantan”, “Koisuru Boukun”, or “Winter Cicada”- where most viewers would be happy if they just put more money in the animation for the sex scenes, especially if you do them straight up! Buuuuuut… Nope! Still crappy.

“Ai no Kusabi”, the ’90s and newest one, didn’t have straight-up sex. I, for one, wasn’t waiting for the climax, literally and figuratively, of the story to be a gorgeous sex scene. They didn’t push that either; however, there were many little scenes- artistic scenes- of sexual acts. What I mean by artistic is that the makers knew they couldn’t afford good animation so they decided to show tasteful reactions, like this:

I wonder what's going on...
I wonder what’s going on…

You can just feel the strain, which you can’t feel in low-budget anime where there are a bunch of cookie-cutter comical faces and the overuse of special effects to demonstration a sense of movement or depth- like this gif does. Look at the shadowing, and how each individual muscle beacons its own movement- see the crease that appears in the leg at the top just as the foot turns. That is how you compensate for not being able to do something huge and glamorous- focus on those minute details and let it shine. Now, I like me comical faces and special effects, for sure, but when I see it used so blatantly to cover up a low budget, I just get sad in the center ya’ know?

And that’s where “Vassalord” really puts out.

Holy animation budget!
Holy animation budget!
Holy animation budget! Part Deux
Holy animation budget! Part Deux

When I saw that first bit at the beginning, I was like- wait, is this BL? Perhaps it’s just fanservice like “K Project”!

Holy BL!
Holy BL!

And then I was like, uhm, no. I mean, here, it could still be fanservice.

If you were desperate for them not to be gay. Otherwise, you would pretty much assume these guys liked each other a bit more than friends. In any case, I’ve already watched this three times and have no problem with watching it more often. It’s quick and sweet and beautiful.

I read a complaint that the humor was off-putting. There wasn’t much… um… funny in this. There was some cute banter, but nothing that took away the seriousness of what was happening. Plus, Charlie’s like 150 and Johnny is, what, a thousand? Puurty sure nothing’s that serious anymore.

To be honest, this would be an even more perfect movie if it had a sex scene, but, from what I heard, the manga doesn’t even have sex in it, so…

Alright,so I was going to put another picture for something I searched but the results were super fucked up. So that’s the end of this review! Watch Vassalord!

 

 

Merle Loves Daryl and Vice Versa! or True Love in The Walking Dead! or Incest is Best!

SPOILERS FOR THE WALKING DEAD- AHEAD! 

Here are Daryl and Merle respectively:

Weeeheehee
Daryl and Merle, lookin’ dangerous

 

They are brothers on AMC’s “The Walking Dead” and Daryl is undeniably my favorite character and possibly the only character I would want to be in a survival group with in a zombie apocalypse. He is the ONLY (ONLY ONE!) character who hasn’t annoyed me, not even a little bit. EVERY SINGLE OTHER character has done something that makes me want to just throw my remote at the fucking screen.

daryl shirt
I would sell my non-existent soul

 

Because Daryl is the only one who hasn’t annoyed me, he is the main object of my sexual thoughts whenever I’m feeling aroused (I’m a self-proclaimed psychological nymphomaniac; I cannot even sleep unless I’m dead tired, or I’m thinking out sexual situations) and watching “The Walking Dead”- Don’t judge me!

Even though I would love for Daryl and Carol to get their lovins on, and would be sorely pissed if that doesn’t come into fruition, I can only satisfy my sexual urges with some man-on-man thoughts. Rick would have been good if he wasn’t insane and cold-hearted (I get the whole survival thing, don’t rib me on that), and Herschel if he was younger, but nothing tickles me bits like thinking of Daryl and Merle.

Merle is a piece of shit most of the time and an asshole a lot of the other. Unfortunately, we have something huge in common: He loves Daryl (in the brotherly way, of course, blah blah). Loves him so much that he was willing to leave freakin’ Woodbury- where he had it, admit it, real good as the Governor’s man- so that he could look ALONE for a whiff of where his brother might be. After nine-fucking-months.

To be honest, if I was Merle’s position then, I doubt I would have started that search. Seemed foolhardy at the time. Definitely not alone, either.

Then, in the latest episode, he desperately packs up to back up his brother and kill the Governor before something happens to him, even talking to Michonne for help. And then, so adorable, his look of ‘manly relief’ when Daryl comes back all right.

Also, though I don’t like falling back on “Oh, he/she doesn’t mean the awful things they say” because that is not a good excuse to be saying awful things (BROTHER, SISTER, FATHER, I’M LOOKING AT YOU), it is getting-annoyingly- more obvious that that is Merle. Or maybe more like he doesn’t mean anything by it, no offense and such (except that he won’t say that last part seriously, thank goodness).

Last but not least, he views, correctly, that the Governor is a threat that needs to be eliminated as soon as possible. But because of his position, no one wants to listen to him, also rightly so, which makes him even more frustrated about Daryl’s safety.

I don’t feel that Merle is redeemed, but is he sexier? Oh, yes! Can he have sex with Daryl in my head? Sure thing.

And, if you haven’t noticed, or if you haven’t read about my writing on The Maléan World (It’s up there! Click! Click!) I greatly enjoy bad/evil/terrifying people who are on the ‘good side’ especially if they have an obsessive love on the ‘good side’ that keeps their hell-bent soul in check.

As a side note, I loved Michael Rooker’s (Merle) character- Grant, I think- in “Slither” (which my family and I have watched multiple, multiple times). He turns into an evil impregnating alien whose hell-bent soul is softened up by his love for Elizabeth Banks- uuuuuh- which eventually becomes his undoing. Ah, love!

 

Yaoi Webcomics and Such: What, Where and Why

Note: I’m sorry this page looks like crap. WordPress won’t keep it the way I want it. After so much damn time I put into this list, I’m pretty pissed.

This is the list of webcomics that I read. Most of them are gay. This is a post a long time in coming, and is linked on my About/Home page. It’ll be edited as time goes on. There are plenty of other good webcomics out there, but I have specific tastes, and so do you. Here are my recommendations (pics are links!):

This little baby above is special because the people have a specific way of linking to their stuff- so there you go. “A Broken Winter” was pretty much ignored by me because- though it has gay males in an dystopian society, plot and prettiness- this story goes a lot darker than how my tastes usually run. I couldn’t read too much without dying a little on the inside. Nevertheless, it has magic and mystery and just more than you would expect in something that could have gone in-love-with-best-friend-schoolboy route. By the way, the boy grows up.

Always Raining HereI have no idea what “Always Raining Here” is about, and I don’t particularly like the art. I’m actually saving it for a rainy day (no pun intended) and when I am feeling particularly down. The cutesy art style, and the fact that it is labeled by the own site as a ‘BL comic’ tells me it will be dramatic (not my taste) but heartfelt. I can already feel it in the art, and I’ll need this someday.

Atland

I haven’t seen an update from “Atland” in a while. “Atland”, though cartoony in style, not gay (though one of the main characters is a lesbian!), is funny, clever, and sweet. Basically, a zombie prince is revived by a priestess to stop an evil in Atland, a fantasy land. A few more characters join, and you have adventures all over the place. I finished the 300+ pages in about a week.

Boned Another webcomic I’m not so sure about. “Boned” has two couples- obviously- and it has just started. The POC got me, and the beginning. The author said the comic is weird, so I’m up for something supernatural, but it seems it my be a gay drama- which I’m totally okay with. The art is very specific and confident. Though not my favorite style, it’s good enough for me to follow.

TheReporterandTheGirl“The Reporter and the Girl” is a mixture of text, video, and comic. The lengths the creators went to into making this got my interest. Yet again, I have no idea what it is about, but I intend to marathon its 18 chapters soon. It doesn’t look gay (gee, really) but its unique vibe had me bookmarking it, and placing it here. This is also a WordPress blog. Cool beans, right?

The Less Than Epic Adventures of TJ and AmalThis is “The Less Than Epic Adventures of TJ and Amal”. For some reason, I saw this webcomic and was like, “Nah”. I was probably very busy at the time with school and stuff. I came back to it when I had more time and now I’m like- HOW DID I PASS THIS UP? Fortunately, I spent months away, so I had months of pages to come back to. The POC (Amal, dur) is wonderful. He and TJ are going from California to New York: Amal is going to his sister’s graduation (at the same time running away from an engagement and coming out to his family) and TJ is going to live with a tattoo artist (and running away from a drug dealer). This comic is epic. If you want my honest opinion, this is the sole must-read on this list. I like other comics better than “TJ and Amal”, but “TJ and Amal” is the best.

The Kingfisher“The Kingfisher”… How apt that this came after “TJ and Amal” (I had added the pictures randomly). This comic was also skipped, because I didn’t like the art. I decided to give it ago because I gave the duo above a second chance. Yet again, I had accumulated enough pages to quench my sudden thirst for this story. Lead character Jack (gay!) is turned to vampire and is swept into their highly hierarchical society, where a coup is coming up from a poor lunatic man from the past. My summary doesn’t do it justice, but this comic deserves more attention- it’s so well-written (and funny) I thought perhaps the guy wrote stories on the side. I would say it’s a must-read, but the art and vampire storyline might turn people off. There isn’t a lot of sex either.

The Young Protectors Written by the same guy who wrote “Artifice”, also on the website, finished, and highly recommended, “The Young Protectors” is a gorgeous webcomic in the style of superhero comics. Main guy Kyle is currently with (platonically) Silver Fox Duncan. Duncan had blackmailed Kyle into his first kiss, saying he would tell the world he was gay. Kyle is the superhero Red Hot, while Duncan is a supervillian, the Annihilator. Anyone who wanted Batman and Robin to hook up, this is the closest thing right now. It also has the most consistent updates. I don’t think Mr. Alex Woolfson has ever gotten sick.

TeahouseThis is “Teahouse”. “Teahouse” is beautiful. It is hilarious. It is moving (character-wise, for me). It is friggin’ sexy. Did I mention beautiful and hilarious? This comic is what got me into webcomics (“Artifice” is a close second). It’s about a bunch of whores and their lives. The beauty and comedy and sex eclipses the drama that would usually turn me away from such stories. I’ve bought their comics, and their special additions. I’ve bought their fucking stickers. Though storytelling-wise, this doesn’t really hold against “TJ and Amal” or “Kingfisher”… It tickles all my bits. I would give it a must-read, but the pace may be slow for most people and may have too much smut. Read it anyway.

Starfighter“Starfighter” followed “Teahouse”. A lot of their followers would say the same. Cain and Abel are those two (you can probably guess which is which) and they are Fighter and Navigator, respectfully, for a spaceship in an army. Cain seems to want Abel for something (other than sex, but Abel nor we readers know) Other characters have finally joined the cast to rile things up. Their side of the war has taken a turn for the worst, but we’ll see how it goes. The creator has a bunch of good art too. My favorite is the alien and Candy Ass.

Spectre and Avenier“Spectre” follows the Avenier website creepy style with some poor guy being kidnapped and, I believe, SPOILER maybe, experimented on. It’s my kind of story with a dominant master sort of guy, and a wrong-place-at-the-wrong-time sort of dude who doesn’t back down easily. Things are progressing nicely. Despite the grotesque pictures sometimes, and the many gory sexualized images available on the Avenier website, it doesn’t feel nearly as dark or depressing as “A Broken Winter”. It’s kind of sad… As long as it has sex, I feel better.

Shounen Fight“Mahou Shounen Fight” is about four magically transforming boy superheroes embodied with the spirit of the seasons to fight any threats to Mama Earth. Is it as cute as it sounds? Yes. Yes, it is. Go on and read it, it’s pure fluff and wouldn’t hurt a bit!

Sfeer Theory“Sfeer Theory” doesn’t seem to be about relationships, but about a war brewing across countries that sort of have this Pakistani-American vibe. I kind of got lost in reading it, as I was trying to understand the magic of Sfeer Theory. I’ll sound like a dumbass explaining it, but the art is wonderful and I’m enjoying the general gist of what is going on. Maybe someone else can explain the war and magic better, haha.

Red LanternMy guiltiest pleasure in all the known universe- and you should know that I have a lot of pleasures I should be guilty of. I avoided “Red Lantern” despite it’s impeccably gorgeous art, fantasy theme, war theme, whore theme.. Because, well, you can see why. I ended up liking it anyway. I haven’t checked it lately because the new location is difficult to keep my attention…. And the thought of the mountain of pages that await  my return sounds wonderful.

Purpurea Noxa“Purpurea Noxa” is another webcomic about vampires. I don’t really know specifically what’s going on and the writers’ native tongue is Italian, but the art is the closest to anime I’ve seen (“Teahouse” has a more artsy feel, though very much influenced by anime) and it surprised me with sex scenes. I don’t know why I wasn’t expecting it, but I wasn’t. Maybe because I’m so confused with the plot. I do know that there are separate covens working towards… something. I’ll have to read it again, haha.

Prince of Cats“The Prince of Cats” is what got me hovering around “Always Raining Here”. This ridiculously sweet story has these two guys coming out their senior year. It is pure drama, no sex, but the auburn-haired guy is talking to cats. And they talk back. I have no idea what is going on there, and I don’t think I’m supposed to know yet. If you like sweet almost run-of-the-mill BL stories, I recommend this.

Oglaf“Oglaf” is comedy, pure and simple. But I don’t know any comedic anything that has so much sex in it. But it’s not real, like, pornographic sex. This comic is more along the lines of classic American comics. You know, with a theme plus a punchline per page. Except “Oglaf” is, I don’t know, hilarious. This is a must-read if you like comedy, though the flippant display of sexual organs may turn people away (it attracted me!), I insist giving this a try because it is hundreds of pages of laughter. I ended up going through a few dozen pages reading stuff again- I’ve forgotten a lot.

Next Town Over“Next Town Over is  is a weekly paean to the western, with some steampunk and fantasy splashed in, updating at the stroke of midnight on Saturdays.  There’s some twists lurking a little deeper in the story, but it’s a bit early to tip my hand talking about those; as of this writing the comic is pretty newly-minted.” 

Not gay, but so far so good. You will have to read it, because anything I say will be spoiler. It’s a nice ride.

Ms Paint Adventures“Homestuck”.  I don’t even… I read all over that this was… good? A comic, or something, but it’s interactive and full of puzzles and mysterious that I’m just chomping through without any good idea what is really going on. A lot of yaoi-lovers like Homestuck so I’mma stick with it and see what’s up.

Minor Acts of Heroism“Minor Act of Heroism” is another comic I skipped because I thought it was yaoi, then I was afraid that it would be too weird for me, and I came back and found out it is about adorable young superheroes against adorable young villains (but they kill people…so… not that cute). The art may be too cute, but the story itself is getting pretty serious, and I love all the characters!

Master!“Master!” may have off-proportioned art, but you can probably understand why I read this, so I’m not going to bother. It does have a more serious plot, but I haven’t gotten that far yet. I’m tasting this bit by bit.

Manly Guys Doing Manly Things“Manly Guys Doing Manly Things” is a comic that mostly caters to lovers of video games and movies and such that perpetuate masculine stereotypes. I randomly found this comic in December last year and now this is one of the regulars. It pokes fun at the stereotypes and characters all across media (the creator has Syndrome from “The Incredibles”!), and tropes of many video games. It is also very beautifully drawn. Hilarious.

LackadaisyGORGEOUS “Lackadaisy” is about anthropomorphic cats living in Prohibition Era St. Louis, trying to keep a speakeasy sort of place afloat. I bought the calendar to this because I had to support the breath-taking art (at least rifle through the gallery, you won’t regret it), the wonderful characterization, the fuckin’ mood of the entire piece. This is one of the best finds I’ve ever had. And, when I have the money, I will continue to support this artist. Action and drama all the way, baby, and it’s done well.

Kyandi“Kyandi” is finished, but I’ve been putting it off because I know it has a sad ending. And sad endings are drama atom bombs. I’ll read it eventually. So far, I’ve read that this dude meets an old flame and things go on from there. I don’t really want to finish it, but one day I’ll just speed on through and cry.

Knights Errant“Knights Errant” is about an assassin who joins an army (actually, may be mercernary group) after not being able to be trusted by employers. He draws the attention of the leader of his part of the woods. It starts off with what looks like him and the leader in a jail cell (that’s the first page, so not spoiler really, right?) Um, this my not be gay, per se, but I can’t tell you more on that unless I want to spoil it.

Incubus Tales “Incubus Tales” is mostly what it sounds like. It’s fluffy, light art is unappealing, but it has some cute, sexy stories. I don’t really take it seriously, but it passed the time when I was reading, so you can try it out.

Feral Gentry“Feral Genry” is about fairies, so far named after certain trees. This guy, Tuomi, was mostly living alone before meeting a fairy named Cypress who invited him to her home. There seems to be something off about this whole situation. I like a good mystery, and the delicate art is strangely appealing, although I don’t usually like it. Perhaps it’s visceral, and fairies are supposed to be more delicate? (While “Incubus Tales” is smut and doesn’t have the art to make itself good smut for me, haha- Aren’t I conceited?)

Devoto- music in hell“Devoto: Music in Hell” was avoided because it gave off vibes, to me, for being similar to “A Broken Winter” after I read too many pages to it. I couldn’t have been more wrong. Anyway, main guy calls upon a demon of music so that he could play the piano. “Devoto” is funny and has some tragic elements of it, and puts a different spin on the fall of angels of Christian mythology. There isn’t a concrete separation between angels and demons like in most other representations, but a complex system that everyone is following. Anyway, that’s separate from the two in the picture. The art is dynamic and beautiful, the writing sometimes straightforward, sometimes witty, and sometimes off in the land of poetic art.

Cheap ThrillsBefore “Red Lantern”, I had “Cheap Thrills”. Though the art is… mediocre in the beginning, the creator makes leaps and bounds, and I ended up loving the story. It’s drama, but with drug use, and POC issues, and religion issues, and death issues- and it’s just very human and pulls at the heart guts. It starts off with main character Jeordie getting laid. There’s a lesbian main character (who’s my favorite!), and all sorts of other good stuff.

Boy Lessons“Boy Lessons” is something I’m not sure of. The art isn’t… Hmmm… It’s very expressive, but doesn’t really have form…But the formlessness of it gives it a sort of form, ya’ know. I’m only a few pages in, but this guy is trying to seduce the man who fired him. Don’t know who this creepy red-eyed dude is.