Tag Archives: the walking dead

Merle Loves Daryl and Vice Versa! or True Love in The Walking Dead! or Incest is Best!

SPOILERS FOR THE WALKING DEAD- AHEAD! 

Here are Daryl and Merle respectively:

Weeeheehee
Daryl and Merle, lookin’ dangerous

 

They are brothers on AMC’s “The Walking Dead” and Daryl is undeniably my favorite character and possibly the only character I would want to be in a survival group with in a zombie apocalypse. He is the ONLY (ONLY ONE!) character who hasn’t annoyed me, not even a little bit. EVERY SINGLE OTHER character has done something that makes me want to just throw my remote at the fucking screen.

daryl shirt
I would sell my non-existent soul

 

Because Daryl is the only one who hasn’t annoyed me, he is the main object of my sexual thoughts whenever I’m feeling aroused (I’m a self-proclaimed psychological nymphomaniac; I cannot even sleep unless I’m dead tired, or I’m thinking out sexual situations) and watching “The Walking Dead”- Don’t judge me!

Even though I would love for Daryl and Carol to get their lovins on, and would be sorely pissed if that doesn’t come into fruition, I can only satisfy my sexual urges with some man-on-man thoughts. Rick would have been good if he wasn’t insane and cold-hearted (I get the whole survival thing, don’t rib me on that), and Herschel if he was younger, but nothing tickles me bits like thinking of Daryl and Merle.

Merle is a piece of shit most of the time and an asshole a lot of the other. Unfortunately, we have something huge in common: He loves Daryl (in the brotherly way, of course, blah blah). Loves him so much that he was willing to leave freakin’ Woodbury- where he had it, admit it, real good as the Governor’s man- so that he could look ALONE for a whiff of where his brother might be. After nine-fucking-months.

To be honest, if I was Merle’s position then, I doubt I would have started that search. Seemed foolhardy at the time. Definitely not alone, either.

Then, in the latest episode, he desperately packs up to back up his brother and kill the Governor before something happens to him, even talking to Michonne for help. And then, so adorable, his look of ‘manly relief’ when Daryl comes back all right.

Also, though I don’t like falling back on “Oh, he/she doesn’t mean the awful things they say” because that is not a good excuse to be saying awful things (BROTHER, SISTER, FATHER, I’M LOOKING AT YOU), it is getting-annoyingly- more obvious that that is Merle. Or maybe more like he doesn’t mean anything by it, no offense and such (except that he won’t say that last part seriously, thank goodness).

Last but not least, he views, correctly, that the Governor is a threat that needs to be eliminated as soon as possible. But because of his position, no one wants to listen to him, also rightly so, which makes him even more frustrated about Daryl’s safety.

I don’t feel that Merle is redeemed, but is he sexier? Oh, yes! Can he have sex with Daryl in my head? Sure thing.

And, if you haven’t noticed, or if you haven’t read about my writing on The Maléan World (It’s up there! Click! Click!) I greatly enjoy bad/evil/terrifying people who are on the ‘good side’ especially if they have an obsessive love on the ‘good side’ that keeps their hell-bent soul in check.

As a side note, I loved Michael Rooker’s (Merle) character- Grant, I think- in “Slither” (which my family and I have watched multiple, multiple times). He turns into an evil impregnating alien whose hell-bent soul is softened up by his love for Elizabeth Banks- uuuuuh- which eventually becomes his undoing. Ah, love!

 

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After “Home” in “The Walking Dead” or I like the Governor! or Survival Sucks!

Alright, so I watch “The Walking Dead”. It’s one of the best shows I’ve watched. I would read the comic but it… doesn’t look very good, art-wise. Shallow, I know. But I’m not going to spend money on art I don’t like.

Anywho, the show is great. It’s especially nice to see Rick have some really bad flaws, seeing as his wife [SPOILER]was[END SPOILER] one of the most flawed characters on the show. Well, not flawed, really, just… annoying. Maggie and her sister aren’t that much better than Lori, Carol’s getting better, and Andrea and Michonne are marriage material, of course.

What I really  liked about this episode was that there was no hang-ups on idiotically selfish choices.  How many times have people chosen to do something terribly selfish for the sake of ‘survival’?

I can understand the whole survival thing, I can. I’ve tasted a drop of it when hungry kids from the neighborhood would come to our house for snacks and my dad would tell them no, going on about survival and his money and all that. And it was acceptable then because those kids would (presumably) get something to eat… eventually.

But if you’re surviving the zombie apocalypse by looting nearby towns what, exactly, does it hurt by letting people in. I can understand not letting in people you don’t trust, but the first time we get a strong case of this was at Herschel’s farm, where, you know, there was little cause for distrust, what with Carl and them looking for Sofia and them helping out with everything. If Herschel really hated Shane at first, that would be perfect, but that wasn’t the case.

If they tried hard enough and wouldn’t turn away everyone, they can get something like Woodbury down.

But, hey, you might say, Woodbury? It’s a terrible place. Wrong! It’s a wonderful place, the best fucking place in what we know of The Walking Dead world. The Governor’s terrible, and the zombie games are terrible, and it would be best if everyone knew how to kill walkers, but if you think hopping ’round town with Michonne or mostly locked up in a jail is better than Woodbury- first of all, you’re lying to yourself, and second, you’re wrong.

Whatever is wrong in your eyes about Woodbury can be corrected by Andrea, and things will be great. If she gets the chance…. I don’t know if it is explained more in the comic, but the governor seems to have been a nice guy before (maybe before Penny died?) and helped all those people…

You see, the whole turning others away or killing others for survival is reasonable in my mind if and only if 1) You think you’re a bad or selfish person and that’s what you want 2) You’re in danger with those other people.

Since Rick’s group isn’t like that, and most of Woodbury’s sheep aren’t like that- they have no reason. For survival? Okay. Think about it, how long will that thinking hold? Killing or turning away people (which, to me, is the same as killing them) isn’t going to have you surviving long. Like, what are you surviving for? When will you start accepting people again? When your kids are half-grown and you’re ailing with old age? Too bad your kids learned to turn away people.

It especially boggled my mind with Tyreese’s group and that kid and man starting on about survival and taking over the jail. I was yelling, “THERE ARE FOUR OF YOU. ONE WOMAN- Just what are you living for? What’s so great about living longer if you that’s all that’s left?”

Oh, but to have Daryl on the show, it is fantastic. It gives me hope. It was pretty romantic (incest is best!) for him to stay with Merle. I was looking forward to him realizing Merle is pretty much an asshole (though this episode has him seeming to realize it as well, and I’m a sucker for leaf-turners) , but I had been hoping that he wouldn’t abandon Merle without a strong push. And he got it this episode. Daryl, who will help people in need without question and without need for compensation, Daryl, who will give his brother a chance, Daryl, who blamed himself for Sofia, Daryl, who mourned Carol, Daryl who knew Rick did right by him and would stand by him. Lovely!

On my brother’s bed with my latest story

I like to write stories (well, I like to do a hell of a lot of things). Um, control + f Writing Block if you want to read about me and writing.. This turned out a lot longer than I intended. 

I also have bipolar disorder (and allergies and asthma and a high risk of stroke without ever smoking cigarettes). 

I went home from school in November. I think I wrote about that, and, if I didn’t, that’s not what I want to write about. I know I wrote about the comics I am reading. I’ve started rereading Tj and Amal after a marathon of recently discovered by moi Manly Men doing Manly Things (It’s absolutely hilarious). For some reason, I got really motivated to write. 

But I’ve been outta school going on three months, and because of constant procrastination and hopelessness and pride and lack of motivation- it doesn’t seem like I’ll be able to go back to school at the end of January, which busted whatever healthy mentality I had left. Over these past weeks, I beat four games (Resident Evil Mercenaries, Resident Evil 6, The Walking Dead, and Kingdom Hearts: Dream Drop Distance…Hm, pick the one that doesn’t belong!) I was really motivated to beat the last two within the last two weeks because I’ve been sleeping 13 hour days and going into my “catatonic skipping” for most of the other 11. I’m a fucking mess.

Unfortunately, I can’t bring myself to care in the least. No one else really does. Well, they’ll care if things become bad (like people do about gun control and rape culture), but most of the time it’s ignored. Not like I’m complaining- if I don’t care, why should anyone else? But it has gotten to a point where I start dwelling on that emo shit that nothing matters in the end and I’m all alone and fuck all what else. 

It’s not helping that my favorite person in the whole world (my brother) seems to have… We’ve kind of distance ourselves from each other. I’ve tried keeping up conversations with him- calling, texting, messaging on Facebook… But we’ve regressed to funny gifs passed between each other and lols. I have my pride, as I’ve said, and I don’t want to come across needy and desperate. My brother has my (what the hell- I meant his. Why did I put ‘my’?) own life to live. But to know that a relationship more precious than air can be rendered so makes me horribly bleak about the future. 

It doesn’t help that my other brother is on some fucking shtick. When I was at school, he and my father got in a fight. My brother was talking about killing himself at his school, and he was sent to a mental hospital and my dad was sent to jail for a week. That was in October. At first, I was all on my bro’s side because I was like- I understand some of your pain. I forgot how much of a little shit he is. He’s milking his situation for all it’s worth: threatening to call the police whenever Pops says boo shit to him, claiming to want to kill himself whenever he is forced to do homework or go to school or fucking apologize for some awful crap he says, and posting Facebook statuses threatening any and all who disagree with him. It’s gotten to a point where I honestly don’t even fucking like him anymore. And he’s such a shallow idiot, if he ever came across this and realized this was his sister, he’ll just be all tl;dr.

It doesn’t help that though my dad is getting the short end of the stick in the above situation, the man is still a gigantic asshole, and my bro’s behavior is his and Mama’s fault. All six of us kids have been telling our parents (since we eldest were in freakin’ elementary school) that they were spoiling him. When my dear brother and I were in high school, and my sister Statistic became such, we were afraid our youngest brother was going to turn out the same way, and we warned our parents. Dad continued to ignore us and Mama was forever like, “You were the same way when you were his age.” Now, it’s come to bite them in the ass. First of all, Mom can never say that shit to me again. When I was younger, and youngest idiot was in elementary school, I still was offended that my mother dare compare me to the likes of my younger brother- because he was a brat compared to me (I used to say that too, and she would say, “You’re a brat, too”). Those middle school years, I would remember when my dad would punch me or slap me or scream at me or call me “fucking stupid” or call me my brother’s slave or a little bitch or fight my brother. I remember in Kindergarten when I put on my favorite shirt and my dad hit me with the metal side of the belt because he was tired of it. I remember being smacked in the eye for choking on a piece of ice. I remember being hit in the stomach because I couldn’t hold my vomit when I got carsick. Yet, when I had told my parents that little bro yet again didn’t do his chores, and I did them for him so that everyone could be fine, I was the rebellious brat. 

Now that my bro is sixteen, I don’t really have to go back to that crap. When I was sixteen, I first chair in band, the only girl on the wrestling team, one of seven members of a high school chapter of a local sorority, making straight A’s, doing all the chores myself to keep a bunch of assholes happy. My bro is practically failing and hasn’t bathed in four days. 

To make me an even more terrible person (this is not sarcasm), I’m kind of glad this all happened. The assholes deserve each other. 

This whole experience hasn’t humbled my father in the least. We were playing Say Anything  (a tiny bit like Apples to Apples) and he was angry that the questions were unfair to people who didn’t know the ‘picker’ well. I.E. his wife and children. I argued that’s part of the game, and he came across so condescending and insulting, I made no efforts to make peace with him. Last night, my sister was finishing up The Walking Dead. She took a break and my dad came down from his room, thinking we were going to play something  more violent (we do play a lot of violent games. I convinced him to look at something so wonderful because The Walking Dead has a titillating amount of substance. Should have known he would ruin it… When the break was longer than he wanted- about seven minutes- he told me to play. I told him that she would miss the game. It was only after a bit of back and forth that I realized that my father hasn’t realized that the game industry has progressed beyond rather pointless coin-grabbing and dot-collecting. When I was trying to explain he suddenly got up and yelled, “Whatever, ya’ll are freakin’ pathetic” and left back to his room.

I told my mom to tell him not to call me pathetic anymore. She pats me on the goddamn arm and says something along the lines of “You know how he acts sometimes” and I told her to just make sure he doesn’t call me that anymore. Especially over something so stupid. Especially because he didn’t understand, and lashed out at me. 

Gee, I wonder why youngest bro has no sense of responsibility and ownership over the consequences of his actions. 

It doesn’t help (along those same lines) that my sister Statistic (the one with the new love of my life- my dear niece) gets drunk and/or high nearly every night, sexes up some guy on the internet nearly every night, complains about her ‘haters’ nearly every hour, and entertains/fantasizes about the thought of sending my niece to her father in New York for about a year. The guy who she couldn’t get to pay child support and so she has reaction formation about it- she made a Facebook video today to all the ‘bitches’ who try to make their ‘baby daddies’ pay child support. The guy who grabbed his daughter by the leg and shook her to make her stop crying. The guy who is a thousand of dollars in debt because he spent more on material to make Spice even as his child went hungry. The guy who made his daughter TERRIFIED of black men unless they grovel FOR WEEKS (or they always come by with candies and technology- i.e. my brother). 

Why does she entertain this idea, you may ask? She’s tired of ‘never doing anything she wants to do’ and ‘taking care of [niece]’. Mind you all her recreational activities. And let’s add her club-going and sneaking out the house- twenty fucking years old. Let’s add the fights she get into with her ‘haters’. The fights she talks about over and over and over and over to all her boy-friends. 

And whenever she gets a job- SHE’S HAD SO FREAKIN’ MANY- LIKE SEVEN OR EIGHT SINCE BEING OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL. Sorry for the caps… Not like anyone is still reading…. Well, she gets high or drunk or pissed and ends up getting fired. She always talks about joining the military. Gets a go about it for a week, two at most, and goes back to the usual stuff. It’s gotten to the point where no one thinks she’ll stick with anything… Kind of like when she started what my parents thought would be her rebellious phase, and was lying constantly so no one believed anything she says (still don’t). 

I’m not upset with her doing stupid shit. I do it enough as well. What I can’t stand is how she can’t own up to it- just like Pops and lil bro.Nothing is ever their fault and even when it obviously is, there’s something indefatigably stupid about you for pointing it out. 

It doesn’t help that my niece is her daughter. 

It doesn’t help that the other sister is on her way to becoming like me, socially wise. Things are probably going to be better for her though. She’s Christian, straight, pretty ‘girly’ in all its stereotypical connotations and concerned with things like popularity and such like that. When I asked her to help me write a Christmas card to a dying kid, she told me such kind of things make her jealous. “Over the cancer kid?” I had asked. She replied that was so. I told her that was bad. She simply shrugged and continued watching Netflix. She is the sibling I most connect to (because of anime, lack of self-esteem and certain books) but something changed then that made me lose all hope for a few days, and now makes my heart heavy. She’s overweight and has extremely high blood pressure, so that hurts her esteem. But she’s cute and funny, while I’m a hairy, bipolar, ugly bitch. 

Ewzers. 

It doesn’t help that my last brother is amazing, but because of age difference and personality differences we never really bonded as I did with my older brother, and now so far in our lives (like it’s sooooo far, haha) I don’t want to get close to him because I don’t want to be separated. 

But from my Writing Block, of which I intended to write and got way sidetracked, and making myself happier with comics, I opened up a story that I hadn’t updated, though I was so excited to share… I opened it up and anxiety welled up inside me. 

YOU CAN’T EVEN STAY IN SCHOOL! YOU THINK YOU’RE GOING TO FINISH THIS?

YOU’VE NEVER HAD A LOVER!

YOUR BROTHER DOESN’T CARE FOR YOU ANYMORE- HE HAS [HIM].

ISN’T THAT YOUR FIFTH DR. PEPPER?

YOUR FEET ARE CRACKED AND BLEEDING FROM SKIPPING- YOU’RE A LUNATIC.

YOU’RE STILL FANTASIZING ABOUT SOME DEUS EX MACHINA TO SAVE YOUR LIFE- HOW PATHETIC!

YOUR MONEY IS ALL GONE BECAUSE YOU SPEND IT TO FILL THAT VOID IN YOUR LIFE- THAT VOID THAT IS GOING TO GET BIGGER AND BIGGER AND BIGGER!

LOOK AT YOU, CRYING OUT FOR HELP- BUT NO ONE IS GOING TO HELP YOU. YOU’RE GOING TO COMMIT SUICIDE. EVERYONE KNOWS IT. 

YOUR FAMILY IS GOING TO GET WORSE AND WORSE AND WORSE- YOUR MOM IS GOING TO HAVE ANOTHER ANEURYSM. POPS IS GOING TO DIE OF CANCER AND YOU’RE GOING TO FEEL AWFUL. 

CHARLIE’S GOING TO BE LIKE [STATISTIC] OR END UP DEAD FROM NEGLECT. 

YOU’LL NEVER BE HAPPY. YOU’LL NEVER BE HAPPY. YOU’LL NEVER BE HAPPY. 

YOU’RE BIPOLAR AND YOU’LL NEVER BE HAPPY. 

*cue shutting down computer music*